Obstacles Help You Overcome

Obstacles exist to test whether or not you are serious about achieving your goals. The Universe wants to know if you really mean to lose weight or if you are just engaging in wishful fantasy. Have you ever noticed that as soon as you set a goal, a boulder-sized obstacle gets thrown in your path? After resolving to lose weight, what do you do if you get invited to a restaurant for cheese and chocolate fondue with your friends? You have not seen your friends in a while and you really want to catch up with them. You rationalize (rational lies) that you will start your diet after the weekend dinner. We all know how this ends - the fruit withers on the vine. You never really get started on the diet.

Instead of felling sidetracked or defeated by an obstacle, look at it for what it really is - a learning experience. To achieve any goal, you need to learn the skills required to do it. Overcoming obstacles provides the lessons that you need to learn to achieve your goal.

Let's look at the fondue example.  You want to go out to dinner with your friends, but you also want to stick with your diet and lose weight. You have a dilemma. You think you must choose the lesser of the evils. Instead of saying no and depriving yourself or saying yes and blowing your diet before you even get started, look for the third alternative. Look for the win-win. Whenever you are faced with a difficult decision, don't settle for 2 choices. There is always another solution, but it may not be obvious. It will probably require some thought. Finding solutions is difficult at first, but then becomes a habit the more you do it. You learn by repetition. The more you apply the skill of problem solving, the better you become at it.

So let's begin building your problem solving muscle. Stop reading now and think of at least 3 more solutions to the problem above...seriously, stop reading and get out a pen and paper and write down 3 solutions. Better yet, think about an obstacle that you are now facing and write this obstacle at the top of the page. Underneath, write 3 solutions. If it is a big obstacle, you may need to write 20 or more ideas before you solve it.

In less that a minute, I came up with the following solutions to the dinner out:

1. Eat a healthy snack before you go to dinner and then find the healthiest thing on the menu to eat or eat only small bites. When your friends ask why you are not eating much, just tell them that you are having so much fun talking and visiting that you forget to eat.
2. Suggest a healthier alternative. Tell them you have heard about this great new restaurant that you have been dying to try.
3. Eat what you want that night, but commit to eating extra healthy a few days before and a few days after.

The secret is to develop the habits that result in you automatically overcoming the obstacles. A quick way to achieve your goal is to model successful people.  What do they habitually do to achieve the success that you are seeking? Whether weight loss, running a marathon, or retiring early is your goal, figure out what people have done to accomplish the goal you have and then do what they do on a consistent basis. If your goal is to be a writer, then write. If your goal is to run a marathon, then run. When an obstacle arises, remove the obstacle or figure out a way around it. Develop your problem-solving muscles. Remember that obstacles are just teaching you the lessons you need to learn. We have a saying in my bicycling club when we are struggling to ride into a 20+ mph headwind, "The wind is my friend." The wind forces us to keep pedaling so that we get strong enough to enjoy the really fast rides in June and July. Welcome obstacles when they arise. They are your friends that will teach you to overcome.